peace...

My teammates leave in less than a month. That's such exciting news. God works and has blessed them to depart in January. What a glorious event! truly.

My last post i was sad to be left behind. Honestly, i was frustrated, heartbroken, and resentful as well. Sure, i wished them well, but it should be me too, shouldn't it?

And then i realized that my actions, my comments were saying that i would willingly follow God (didn't i too say, "here am i, send me" ??), BUT only if it were according to my conditions and expectations.

How absurd! If i am truly going to let God lead me, then i need to follow Him. Not just where i think i should go, but which ever direction He goes.

It's definitely not the easiest thing i've done, more likely one of the hardest. But i am now at peace with that, with letting God lead and being (or trying to be) content following.

for God to be in control of my life, i have to totally and completely let go.
even if that means i may not head the direction i planned.